speaking of seeing what happens…

Unless it’s raining, I go for a walk around my office buildings every day between 2 and 3. I make phone calls and check out nature, get some fresh air and some privacy (except for the smokers and the exhaust from cars and the other people walking around trying to have private cconversations, but hey, we all have to try to live together peacefully.)

So today, while walking, I found this.

I don’t know what this is.

I kept it, though, and am going to plant it in an pot with dirt and see what happens.

Other than the tragic Moonflower Transplanting Incident, I’ve had pretty good luck with growing things from seed. Right now I have tomatoes and gypsophilia growing by the gate, looking very happy from all the rain and full sun.

If anyone knows wtf this is, please message me.

kinda nice

Readership has plummoted lately, guess because I haven’t been updating all that much… and when I do, it’s random quotations, pictures, or mundane details… well.

I’m writing a character list right now for what may be a novel and I just have to say, seeing what comes out of my mind and onto the page is sometimes a wee bit frightening.

So far I have a misogynist closet homosexual with a Napoleon complex, his wife, an alcoholic, depressed stay-at-home mother who is having an affair with her old high school boyfriend whom she met up with off of Facebook, the boyfriend, who is everything her husband isn’t including tall and not gay, only he’s a player of sorts, and then we have the chain-smoking nagging mother-in-law with a dirty secret, and also the two screwed up teenage kids, and the boyfriend’s other mistress who works as a waitress in the French Quarter and is an exchange student from London…

Oh yegods they are already way out of hand. They’re running amok. They’re out of control. Whoosh, off into the night, doing whatever they please, while I run behind, pen in hand.

Good news is that I already have the fate of the wife planned out and it’ s at least a happy ending for her.

Anyway all I was trying to say when I started this post is that it’s kinda nice to not have so many readers these days… I don’t feel as pressured to write imporant, meaningful updates or at least aim in that direction…

Less pressure=good.

I think I’ll do this for a while, just stream from head to keyboard like this, see what happens…

a day in the life

Maj. Major Major Major: Sergeant, from now on, I don’t want anyone to come in and see me while I’m in my office. Is that clear?
First Sgt. Towser: Yes, sir? What do I say to people who want to come in and see you while you’re gone?
Maj. Major Major Major: Tell them I’m in and ask them to wait.
First Sgt. Towser: For how long?
Maj. Major Major Major: Until I’ve left.
First Sgt. Towser: And then what do I do with them?
Maj. Major Major Major: I don’t care.
First Sgt. Towser: May I send people in to see you after you’ve left?
Maj. Major Major Major: Yes.
First Sgt. Towser: You won’t be here then, will you?
Maj. Major Major Major: No.
First Sgt. Towser: I see, sir. Will that be all?
Maj. Major Major Major: Also, Sergeant, I don’t want you coming in while I’m in my office asking me if there’s anything you can do for me. Is that clear?
First Sgt. Towser: Yes, sir. When should I come in your office and ask if there’s anything I can do for you?
Maj. Major Major Major: When I’m not there.
First Sgt. Towser: What do I do then?
Maj. Major Major Major: Whatever has to be done.
First Sgt. Towser: Yes, sir.

 - from Joesph Heller’s Catch-22

what’s been going on

Well, I’ll tell you.

I’ve been making a lot of print work lately as you can see in my recent posts. I’m thinking I’ll build a site for selling them online soon, been tossing around domain names this morning in between computer crashes. They look great poster-size, and I can do theme-based prints on demand as well. I did a tribute to Bjork and a Tori poster that turned out especially well, and I have a Beck-themed print in work, too.

One day, one of my business ideas and/or inventions and/or novels/paintings etc… will get me out of the cubicle. I am determined. In any case, I will die trying goddammit.

Anyway.

Today is the one month anniversary of co-habitation with the boyfriend, and it’s working out pretty well. I love living with him. I also really love our dishwasher. I actually look forward to going home at night. Because both he and the dishwasher are usually there.

We had a party at our new place this past Saturday: The First Annual Hunter S. Thompson Fourth of July Party. Michael grilled a stupid amount of food and lots of our friends and random people showed up. Everyone seemed to have a good time and it lasted pretty much all day long. The cleanup yesterday wasn’t bad. Again, can I just say I love the dishwasher.

I’m still buried at work and it won’t change any time soon, in fact it is getting worse, got two new RoboHelp projects to update. However I  have learned not to take anything up here seriously, so my stress levels are no higher than when I spend all day reading fark.com.

Been slacking about the gym the last couple weeks but I am starting back tonight.

The  novelty of the new place still hasn’t burned off so I haven’t been doing much writing or painting at home, been mostly just chilling out enjoying the house. Also, my studio doesn’t have A/C and it’s been so hot….

I’m happy. I know it doesn’t make an exciting or interesting read, but it is true: I am happy… and more relaxed than I have been in a great while. And in this space, I can create. I can write and make new things when the other areas of  my life are calm and cohesive. This is the space I create best in, actually.

I am not pressuring myself as much to be a Great Artist/Poet/Writer/Whatever or constantly telling myself OMG DO IT YESTERDAY WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!??!??!! like I have been for so many years. I am cool with not being perfect or insanely productive right now.

It will come when it comes. 

That said… I may need to do Artist’s Way soon, though. I may need to formulate and stick to a writing schedule. I may need to rethink my priorities and how I spend my time every day. I may need to start another book soon, one that takes substantially more than three days to write. It may even be a book of serious poetry, who knows.

I think what I need to do is make time every day to just sit and wait. Make myself available at the typewriter, at the computer, at the notebook, and see what, if anything, comes.

I may need to start waking up earlier.

I may need to quit watching so many movies.

real life blood roses

blood roses

liquified mary magdalene

VOODOO 2009

Lineup etc here (pops).

JANE’S ADDICTION IS GOING TO PLAY.

Yes, as in the original members of Jane’s Addiction. All of them!

As well as Q-Tip, Ween, The Flaming Lips, George Clinton and Parliament Funkadelic and the New Orleans Bingo! Show.

 

boiling hot lavas

she’s your cocaine

She’s your cocaine
She’s got you shaving your legs
You can suck anything
But you know you wanna be me
Put on your make-up boy
You’re your favourite stranger
And we all like to watch
So shimmy once and do it again
Bring you sister
Bring you sister if you can’t handle it
She says control it
Then she says don’t control it
Then she says you’re controlling
The way she makes you crawl
She’s your cocaine your Exodus laughing
And she knows what you are
So shimmy once and do it again
Bring you sister
Bring you sister if you can’t handle it
If you want me to
Boy I could lie to you
You don’t need one of these to let me inside of you
And is it true
That devils end up like you
Something safe for the picture frame
And is it true
That devils end up like you
So tied up you don’t know how she came
She’s you Cocaine
She’s got you shaving your legs
She got you liking mine back
Go me takin it in
Getting mine back
Lasting mine evil
I’m taking me easel
And I’m writing good checks
You sign Price of Darkness
Try squire of dimness
Please don’t help me with this
Please don’t help me with this
Please don’t help me with this

Cut it again